From the all-night crowd to the Long White Cloud


Farmer Morebottle, food-loving ploughboy turned playboy, began the tale of his globe-trotting trip Down Under last week (new readers click here). He’s on the move again. . .

Wednesday January 22

MOREBOTTLE: Singapore today, Banksy, but the meat-eating world’s gone mad! Talk about yer oriental culinary delights! It’s a joke: Singapore is actually full of Italian restaurants!

It’s Singapore, for food’s sake! Does THIS look like noodles?

ME: And Milan is full of Indian takeaways while you make Spanish tapas at Campie. Exactly what dangerously ethnic slur are you working up to here?

Forget it. Just saying. . . anyway, some of the sights are pretty amazing. Look at this one:

I’d like to think this much rain is currently falling on my land!

ME: Rain in the Borders? ‘Fraid not, old Phil-Yer-Boots. Cold and mainly dry here. Anyway, that hanging garden’s got nothing on the Virginia Creeper that’s holding your farmhouse up!

Still, some things are amazing. Imagine if you will Tania’s shock at finding a Singapore Sling was the same price as dinner for two was in Penang!

That at least gives us a clue as to who is bankrolling this global eat-and-all-you-can-drinkfest! Poor Tania! Where’s the next stop?

Off to Auckland, NZ tomorrow for a wee drive-about!

Friday, January 24

At last! The Land of the Long White Cloud!

New Zealand at last, Land of the Long White Cloud (and the ice-cold beer!)

This is the life! Napier in the sunshine (below), a lovely place, rebuilt all Art Deco after an earthquake.

Napier, North Island: devastated by a 1931 earthquake, rebuilt in Art Deco

Off to South Island on Tuesday, weather is great here but I’m sure there will be some rain in the south!

Still got that old ploughboy’s weather nose, eh Playboy? We’re forecast gales and snow in the Borders, if that makes you feel warmer!

Tuesday, January 28

Crossed to the South Island today, in to Marlborough wine country, ooooh, stunning scenery along with stunning weather! 


Approaching South Island (and wonderful Marlborough wine country!) by ferry

Hmmm. In Marborough country? Extraordinary we’ve heard nothing about booze for a while, have you both fallen ill?

Tania’s coronavirus is clearing up, a few cough sweets seemed to do the trick! Off to some hot springs tomorrow as T had been muttering about a hot geyser for a while, hope it’s cheaper than a sparkly brut!

If she’s talking about hot geezers you’ve wasted your dough and you’re about to be dumped. Try and finish the travelogue before that happens, there’s a good chap!



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